Post –   Abortion Counseling

• Do you find yourself struggling to turn off feelings or memories related to your abortion(s)?
• Do you need to keep reminding yourself to just forget it or put it behind you? 
•  Do you become uncomfortable around reminders of the abortion, such as being around babies or pregnant women, being in a doctor’s office, or when hearing news reports about abortion?
• Do you feel anxious at the idea of telling a loved one about your abortion?
• Is your abortion a secret that is holding you back from greater intimacy with others? 
• When you do choose to share your abortion experience with others, are you overcome with strong feelings such as anger, grief, or guilt?
• Is there an increased distance between you and your parents, siblings, or partner because of the past abortion(s)?
• Do you have trouble talking about the abortion issue as a political issue?
• When you do talk about it, do you find it hard to respect opposing views, or do you become overly emotional, either in support or in opposition to it?
• Do you tend to look at life in terms of “before” and “after” the abortion(s)?
• Are there traits about your “self” before the abortion that you lost but would wish to regain?
• Has the abortion changed the way you look at yourself?
•  Have you lost interest in taking care of yourself?
• Have you tried to become less attractive to avoid the risk of becoming involved in a relationship, love, and sex?
• Do you become angry or depressed more easily?
• Have you experienced “reconnects” to your abortion, such as nightmares, flashbacks, or hallucinations, such as hearing a baby cry?
• Was there a period after your abortion when you experienced an increase in the use of alcohol or drugs?
• Have you experienced other forms of emotional deadening?
•  Have you experienced any suicidal thoughts?
• Do you take risks that put your life in danger?
• Have you developed any eating disorders?
•  Do you have trouble finding, building, or maintaining good relationships with people of the opposite sex?
• Do you have trouble with issues of trust and control?
•  Have you lost the desire for sexual intercourse?
• Do you have increased pain during intercourse? Have you become promiscuous because of low self-esteem? Have you lost a previous desire to have children, or are you filled with an anxious desire to have a child as soon as possible?
•  Do you experience periods of depression, heightened anxiety, or cramping during certain months of the year, particularly during the month of your abortion or due date of the aborted pregnancy?
• Did you have faith in God that you have now lost?
• Are you afraid of God? Are you angry at God?

Simply put, most women who choose abortion are going against their own moral codes, and this explains why they feel guilty afterward. And guilt is what stops them from talking about it or getting the emotional help they deserve. A number of counselors who have explored this issue in some depth have identified a condition that they call “Post-Abortion Syndrome” (or PAS), defined as an ongoing inability to:

• Process the painful thoughts and emotions — especially guilt, anger, and grief — which arise from one or more unplanned pregnancies and subsequent abortions. 
• Identify (much less grieve) the loss that has been experienced. 
• Come to peace with God, herself and others involved in the pregnancy and abortion decision.

If you have ever had an abortion, you probably feel very much alone with the memories of your experience. Perhaps the father of the baby has long since passed out of your life. Or it seems as if no one wants to hear about your pain anymore. So you’ve taken all those complicated feelings surrounding the abortion decision and stuffed them down and tried not to think about them, right?

Did you know that 44 percent of all American women will have an abortion at some point during their lifetime? More than a million American women will have an abortion this year, but hardly any of them talk about it. Why is that?

Many women who have abortions are very uncertain about their decision. On one hand, their feelings say, “This is my baby…I will do what I need to in order to protect and nurture this child.” But too often, their circumstances say, “This is not a good time to have a baby…abortion is legal and easy; it’ll be as if it never happened…it’s the only solution to this mess.”

Healing and Education for Abortion-Related Trauma (HEART) exists to provide women in post-abortion trauma with the caring support they need as they walk through the pain and guilt of past abortions.